He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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