think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Randomize
