on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize
