there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
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