I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Randomize
