batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
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