Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
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