just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Randomize
