It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
Randomize
