allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
