My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize
