You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
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