I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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