am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
Randomize
