she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
How does one acquire holy water?
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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