So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
