You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
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