That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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