Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Randomize
