She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
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