Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
