You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
