Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
Randomize
