at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
Randomize