Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
