it hurts more in the daytime
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
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