While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
