Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
You know what would have been funny if we got arrested last night? The inventory search of the lock box:\n\nContents:\n1 work ID\n1 33 round Glock magazine\n1 set of keys\n1 vibrator\n2 bags fruit snacks\n1 parking hang tag
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