Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Randomize
