my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Randomize
