Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus.
Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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