Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
If its not for food we ain't going out.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
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