Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
