Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
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