We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
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