U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Randomize
