I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
