True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
