he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
Randomize
