Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize