That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
how do you play pong handcuffed?
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Randomize
