Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
Randomize
