I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
