It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
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