wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
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