Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
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