He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
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