i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Randomize
