Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Randomize
