Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
Randomize
